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Update...hope!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! By Maharet0979 Hi Everybody!
It's been a long time since I've posted on this board. When i was going through the worst of my break-up, it really helped to read stories from people who had been there, survived, and were doing well. I always hoped to be able to come back and do the same for someone else, so here goes.
For those of you who don't remember my situation, my ex broke up with me after a three year relationship while I was drunk, and then refused to sit down with me and have a decent conversation about it...no closure, nothing. I have not seen or spoken to him in four months (which I can't stress enough speeds the healing process along tremendously!!!!). 4 months ago I was so anxious I couldn't sleep, I was drugging myself with sleeping pills to fall asleep and popping out of bed at 5am. I dropped 20 lbs in one month. I couldn't concentrate on anything, all of thoughts were of him and the (possible) new woman that he was with. I cried constantly and was convinced that my pain would never end.
Then gradually, something remarkable happened...the thoughts of him became less frequent and less intense, the nightmares became fewer and farther between, I started sleeping for longer periods of time, I started eating again. I started to enjoy living alone and being independent. I started to realize that he wasn't perfect and that I wasn't a f*ck-up. In short, I started getting over him. Then, in October, something I really wasn't expecting happened, I met someone; someone who is kind and caring, and treats me with the respect that I deserve. We're taking it very slowly, one thing I've learned from the past is not to rush into things, but my point is, this will be you one day!!!
For all of you who are struggling right now, convinced that you will never recover and never find someone else to care about, you will!! Here are some final words of advice for those of you who are going through the worst.
-No Contact - this is the most important healing tool that you have, the less you see of your ex, the quicker you will get over him/her!
-Take care of yourself - pamper yourself, write a list of things that make you happy, and even if you don't feel like doing them, get up and do them anyway!
-Lean on your friends, family and the people on this board.
-Don't believe the things you think about yourself - this was not all your fault, you're worth a lot more than you think.
-Allow yourself to feel all of your emotions, when you feel like crying cry, when people ask you how you're doing, be honest, don't try and numb yourself with drugs or alcohol, this will only prolong your natural healing.
-Finally, stay strong and have faith that this will pass, because even though it may be the worst pain that you've ever felt, you will get over it, and you will move on.
I hope this has been helpful...Happy New Year everyone!
-M Click here to read or respond to Maharet0979's original post Back to Success Stories |
