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Elves Hfirimain.....ElvesHfirimain@groups.msn.com 
  
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Humor

Here are some jokes, and a Gallery with captions and what not...

*******************

~*JoKeS*~

An orc captain was marching his entire army to attack Rivendell, they were passing an old abandoned city when they heard a voice within the ancient city's walls: "One Elf is better than ten orc soldiers!" The captain was enraged and immediatly sent ten of his best troops over the walls while the remainder of the company waited outside. Then came the sound of a terriffic fight going on, soon all was quiet. Then the voice spoke again: "One Elven soldier isbetter than a hundred orc soldiers!" Well, the captain sent hundred of his best men over the walls. Soon came the sounds of fight and then silence. The voice spoke up again: "One Elven soldier is better than a thousand orc soldiers!" The captain was furious. He immediately sent the remainder of his troops over the walls save only himself. There came the sound of a fierce battle, and then silence followed by the sound of an elf laughing. Finally, one lone orc stumbled back from the battle and collapsed at the captains feet. "Speak! What happened?" asked the captain. The soldier replied with his last breath. "It....was..a trap..there's...TWO...of...them..."

During their search for the two halflings, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli are discovered by the Uruk-Hai who take them captive. The three plead with Ugluk and finally he agrees to let them go as long as they forfill a task to be made up by his Uruk troops. When the decision is made, Ugluk approaches them... "You may leave, if you go into Fangorn and bring back 100 pieces of your favourite fruit. We will tell you what to do with it when you return. You shall have a guard with you so you don’t escape." So the three warriors and their guards ventured into Fangorn and eventually returned with their fruit. Aragorn was the first to return, carrying 100 Apples. Ugluk told him that: "if you wish to survive, you must shove all 100 apples up your bottom without making any facial expressions or noises." So Aragorn started. 1,2,3,4... 60,61 and then "OOOOOOOOOOhhh!!!" he cried out in pain and was killed on the spot by dozens of arrows. Next back came Legolas, carrying 100 grapes of a bright green. He was told the instructions and started his task. 1,2,3,4,5,6... 95,96,97 and then he burst out laughing!!! He was dead in a matter of seconds. At the gates of Arvandor, while they awaited guidance from ERU to their eternal home, Aragorn asked Legolas why he had laughed. "You were so close to living! Now who shall save the hobbits?" To which Legolas replied, "I couldn’t help myself! I just saw Gimli coming back with an armful of pineapples!"

~*HuMoR gAlLeRy*~

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