About Bisexuality 

What is Bisexuality?

Bisexuality is the potential to feel sexually attracted to and to engage in sensual or sexual relationships with people of either sex. A bisexual person may not be equally attracted to both sexes, and the degree of attraction may vary over time.

Self-perception is the key to a bisexual identity. Many people engage in sexual activity with people of both sexes, yet do not identify as bisexual. Likewise, other people engage in sexual relations only with people of one sex, or do not engage in sexual activity at all, yet consider themselves bisexual. There is no behavioral ``test'' to determine whether or not one is bisexual.

 

Bisexual Identity

Some people believe that a person is born heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual (for instance due to prenatal hormonal influences), and that their identity is inherent and unchangeable. Others believe that sexual orientation is due to socialization (for example either imitating or rejecting parental models) or conscious choice (for example, choosing lesbianism as part of a political feminist identity). Others believe that these factors interact. Because biological, social, and cultural factors are different for each person, everyone's sexuality is highly individual, whether they are bisexual, gay or lesbian, heterosexual, or asexual. The ``value'' placed on a sexual identity should not depend on its origin. Many people assume that bisexuality is just a phase people go through. In fact, any sexual orientation can be a phase. Humans are diverse, and individual sexual feelings and behavior change over time. The creation and consolidation of a sexual identity is an ongoing process. Since we are generally socialized as heterosexuals, bisexuality is a stage that many people experience as part of the process of acknowledging their homosexuality. Many others come to identify as bisexuals after a considerable period of identification as gay men or lesbians. A recent study by Ron Fox of more than 900 bisexual individuals found that 1/3 had previously identified as lesbian or gay. An orientation that may not be permanent is still valid for the period of time it is experienced. Bisexuality, like homosexuality and heterosexuality, may be either a transitional step in the process of sexual discovery, or a stable, long-term identity.

How Common Is Bisexuality?

It is not easy to say how common bisexuality is, since little research has been done on this subject; most studies on sexuality have focused on heterosexuals or homosexuals. Based on research done by Kinsey in the 1940s and 1950s, as many as 15-25% of women and 33-46% of men may be bisexual, based on their activities or attractions. Bisexuals are in many ways a hidden population. In our culture, it is generally assumed that a person is either heterosexual (the default assumption) or homosexual (based on appearance or behavioral clues.) Because bisexuality does not fit into these standard categories, it is often denied or ignored. When it is recognized, bisexuality is often viewed as being ``part heterosexual and part homosexual,'' rather than being a unique identity. Bisexuality threatens the accepted way of looking at the world by calling into question the validity of rigid sexual categories, and encourages acknowledgment of the existence of a diverse range of sexuality. Since there is not a stereotypical bisexual appearance or way of acting, bisexuals are usually assumed to be either heterosexual or homosexual. In order to increase awareness, bisexuals have begun to create their own visible communities.

Bisexual Relationships

Bisexuals, like all people, have a wide variety of relationship styles. Contrary to common myth, a bisexual person does not need to be sexually involved with both a man and a woman simultaneously. In fact, some people who identify as bisexual never engage in sexual activity with one or the other (or either) gender. As is the case for heterosexuals and gay men and lesbians, attraction does not involve acting on every desire. Like heterosexuals and gay people, many bisexuals choose to be sexually active with one partner only, and have long-term, monogamous relationships. Other bisexuals may have open marriages that allow for relationships with same-sex partners, three-way relationships, or a number of partners of the same or other gender (singly or simultaneously). It is important to have the freedom to choose the type of sexual and affectional relationships that are right for the people involved, whatever their sexual orientation.

 

Bisexual Resource Center
P.O. Box 1026
Boston, MA 02117-1026, USA.
Phone 617-424-9595
<BRC@BIRESOURCE.ORG>

 

 Common Myths about Bisexuality 

1. Myth: Bisexuality only is a transition phase for people coming out as gay or lesbian.

Reality: Some gay and lesbian people identify as bisexual before coming out as gay or lesbian. Likewise, some people who now identify as bisexual previously identified as gay or lesbian. Other people identify as bisexual their whole lives. For some people, their experience of sexuality is fluid, something that can change over the course of their lifetimes.

2. Myth: Bisexuals are equally attracted to men and women.

Reality: Some are. But many people who identify as bisexual are be more attracted to men or more attracted to women. Some say they are attracted to men and women in different ways, and others say gender is not relevant to whom they are interested in. One way of understanding this is the Kinsey scale. Kinsey put sexual orientation on a scale from 0 to 6, with 0 being exclusively heterosexual and 6 exclusively homosexual. Much attention focuses on the Kinsey "3" -- a perfect bisexual who is exactly one half way between gay and straight. But people whose experiences fall in the 1 to 5 range may also chose to identify as bisexual.

3. Myth: Bisexual people are more promiscuous than heterosexual or gay and lesbian people.

Reality: Bisexuality is a sexual orientation. It is independent of the decision to be monogamous or non-monogamous. Some heterosexuals, gays, lesbians, and bisexuals are monogamous, others are not. It is a mistake to assume that because someone has the potential to be attracted to men and women, they must have twice as many sex partners.

4. Myth: Bisexuals need at least one partner of each gender.

Reality: Bisexuals have the potential to be attracted to more than gender, but they do not necessarily need to have a partner of each gender. Most bisexuals do not have to be involved with more than one gender at a time in order to feel fulfilled.

5. Myths: Everyone is bisexual. No one is bisexual.

Reality: These two statements reflect the our culture's mixed messages about bisexuality, and neither is true. Some people identify as bisexual. Many more will have had, and will continue to have, sexual experiences with both men and women.

Links

Bisexual Resource Center    Bisexual.org