This is an article that I found on an e-mail list that I belong to, it was written by Lisa, and I thought it would be something that should be shared with all of you.
God Bless,
Barb
A.C.C.E.P.T.A.N.C.E.
I've been thinking a lot today about the acceptance of cross dressing in a relationship. And, the more I thought about it, the more I kept coming back to the belief that a loving relationship develops where there are certain building blocks that provide the relationship with a solid foundation. And,
where there is a strong and loving foundation, the ability to be accepting of so many things is possible.
Here are some thoughts on those building blocks to support ACCEPTANCE:
Acknowledge ...
one another's feelings. Don't try to rationalize why one of you shouldn't feel a certain way. When we have a feeling, we don't need to have it "solved" as much as we just need to know that the other person is trying to understand and is willing to acknowledge that it is a feeling.
Communicate ...
with one another about what you like, what you don't like, and what you would like the other person to do to differently.
Compromise ...
is the key to mutual happiness! If you're both not willing to give a little in order to find a place where you can both be comfortable ... then one of you is going to be unhappy. And, if a person is unhappy and feels that their needs aren't important, they are most likely going to become resentful.
Enjoy ...
what makes you BOTH happy! Even the little things ... like buying something really special for the other one just because you know it will make them smile. (This is going to take some more communication to find out what makes you both happy, but it's so worth it!)
Patience ...
is indeed a virtue! Have patience in exploring new things ... or going further that one of you might be comfortable with right now. Even though it may be hard, have self-control by thinking of the other person's feelings as well as your own desires.
Trust ...
one another. Even if previously, there were reasons that things were kept in the "closet," trust that the future is going to be wonderful because you BOTH are working together to that end!
Ask ...
questions! If you're wondering about something, don't make yourself crazy worrying about "what could be." Just ask a question. It's a great way to get the communications started.
Nurture ...
the relationship that you have developed. The investments of time, commitment and love that we all make in our relationships before a problem arises are still valid! Never lose sight of the foundation of your love. These are things that give us strength to overcome any challenge!
Cuddle ...
to be hugged and held gently in the arms of someone you love can communicate so much without ever having to say the first word! [This is one of Holly's three C's ... but, notice, all three C's in her formula for happiness are included in ACCEPTANCE!]
Experience ...
is the best teacher sometimes. All of us here on EOL have so much to share with one another. Whether we have years of experience, or whether we only have a few days of experience in dealing with the issues of cross dressing, we ALL have experience with what it takes to have a great relationship with another special person! And, through sharing what we know, we can all benefit!
A cknowledge
C ommunicate
C ompromise
E njoy
P atience
T rust
A sk
N urture
C uddle
E xperience!
