"It's better to be sworn in than sworn at."
- SENATOR PATRICK J. LEAHY, (D-VT), after taking the oath of office from Vice President Dick Cheney, who last year addressed him with an expletive

"CNN To Cancel Crossfire: Thank God - that show stunk. No, you idiot, it was an intelligent back-and-forth discourse on politics. Shut yer yap - I say it stunk! Well, I say I can scream louder than you!!!! Okay, next topic: Sisqo's 'Thong Song' - I feel it's a saucy party anthem. Actually...I agree."
- DALTON ROSS' HitList in Entertainment Weekly

"This is one of those stories nobody quite understood in the first couple of days exactly what this was goingto be. The White House didn't understand it, journalists didn't understand it, and aid organizations didn't understand it. Now, more and more reporters are wandering into the story. But everyone was slow to completely grasp the significance."
- ABC News correspondent BOB WOODRUFF, reporting Monday from Colombo, Sri Lanka.

"Chairman Michael Powell of the FCC and his little band of commissioners -- the Blind Leading the Stupid. TheReckless Leading the Feckless. And so on. Yes, sex, violence, bad taste and bad language are problems in television, but unlike Powell, they aren't involved in making mincemeat of the First Amendment."
- TOM SHALES, in his year-end column in The Washington Post

"Here's a big word for today: dehumanization. .. Guys, if you exploit a girl, it will come back to get you. That's called 'karma.'"
- BILL O'REILLY, in his new advice book, "The O'Reilly Factor for Kids." The book contains a chapter on sex:

"Keep in mind there is only one episode left and on that episode we were going to announce the winner! Amazing. Why would a network cancel a show with only one episode left?"
-- Jay Mohr, in Variety, on NBC's possible cancellation of "Last Comic Standing"

"Conan O'Brien is the most powerful person in television because he pushed Leno out of the chair, and he's really calling the shots over there at NBC. And now that we have a friend on 'The Tonight Show,' maybe I'll be invited as a guest on that show!"
- DAVID LETTERMAN, on the eventual change of the guard at NBC's 'Tonight Show'

"A real victory in the war on terrorism. We finally got the guy who wrote Peace Train."
- JON STEWART

"You tell those guys from Presidente (beer) to kiss my [behind]... I told him, 'I think your show [stinks]. Idon't want to be a part of it anymore. Is there any part of that message you don't understand?'"
- Miami Dolphins analyst JIM MANDICH to WPLG News Director Bill Pohovey. Mandich quit his part-time gig as a WPLG commentator Tuesday after a disagreement with station management about -- no joke -- what kind of beer he drinks.

"The question is, why didn't you do it sooner? The story is true. I believed in the story. . . . What kind of reporter would I be -- what kind of person would I be -- if I put something on the air that I believed and then didn't stand behind it? At the first sign of pressure, you run, you cave, you fold? I don't do that."
- DAN RATHER