London Olympics Souvenir Issue
The beat on the street
'Oi'
Free with The BOOT
Yo Blads, there's some serious bling coming to London in 2012 and you want your share yeah? Well here's what you've gotta do...you gotta win, know what I mean but first you gotta train so here at Oi, with the help of our top pharmacist, we've put together a top training package for you and the blads to follow.
4am: 1 x Orange Bomber - to start the day off with a gentle buzz.
5am: 3mgs Smack n' crack - to really get the good health juices flowing
6am: Free base 6mgs of Dizzle Dazzle - and dance baby dance!
7am: 6x Superfit Vit - watch those muscles grow.
8am: 1 bowl of Ketamine Flakes with plenty of milk and music - relax
9am: It's snap crack and popper time! Two tabs each - now watch your eyeballs go.
10am: One large teaspoon full of PCP (angel dust) now hit the road for a gentle jog, breathe deep appreciate the feeling.
11am Still jogging.
12am Still jogging
1.oo: Still jogging
2pm: Still jogging
3pm: Still jogging
4pm: Still jogging
5pm: Still jogging
6pm: Catch the train back from Manchester.
8pm: 8 x Beef up your Bod herbal health tabs
9pm: 1x bowl of Ketamine bran flakes
10pm:Take a break blads, chill out, feel the fitness flow.
To win gold Oi's top pharmacist recommends this daily diet for the next four years after which, to avoid controversy, revert to bacon and eggs for breakfast, a light salad for lunch and spaghetti for dinner...so when you win no one will suspect a thing - know what I'm sayin?
Mc GAZZMAN leading from the front
'Oi' Movies 
Exclusive news reaches us that Ken Russel has been signed to direct the Quoran Codes currently in development at Warners and rumoured to star Brad Pitt as the man himself and Jenifer Aniston (Brads ex) his childhood bride -quoscars all round we think!
Lord of the Rings re-make: A new 8 film package of Lord of the Rings has been slated in at Paramount to be directed by Lars Van Trier.
King Kong re-make: Peter Jacksons' King Kong is to be re-made by MGM as a musical. Ding Dong it's King Kong will feature music by Rocky Horror Show maestro Richard O' Brian and will include such numbers as: 'Let's do the King Konga again' and 'Singalong it's King Kong'
Casino Royale re-make: Before it's even been released Daniel Craig's Casino Royale is to be re-made by Hollywood Pictures as Casino Chicken Royale starring Woody Harroldson as JB himself in a spectacular comdey caper penned by the 'wild and crazy guy' himself - Steve Martin.
'Oi' MUSIC 
'0i' Lady Sovrin - Hands off!
Classic 70's smash - Birdy Birdy Cheap Cheap to be re-released as 'Yo Yo You Mingin' Ho' and sung by Lady Sovrin.
'Oi' Russ - you muppet!
So where's Russ Conways latest album, the one he promised us with Charlie Drake? Come on Russ stand and deliver - you promised.
'Oi' a new name to watch out for...
Watch out for new name Michael Jackson, a lil' coloured fellow with curley hair, does a cracking version of Rocking Robin and something called a moon walk??? Will keep you informed.
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Gawp!
