Shanta's Sad Demise

 

Quite a few of you would have known by now that Shanta, ( wife of Sai and Mother of Puneet & Vineet ) has left all of us and is no more.  The sad event occurred at 6.05 a.m. on Saturday, 1st November, 2003.  We had lost her to Cancer.

Our family is at a total loss for words, when we write this article on her departure from this world.  There is nothing that affects anyone more than the death of their loved ones.  And in this case - especially for us, it is the loss of a woman - who was the heart and soul of our family  !   It is said that Death is the final awakening - so we hope and pray, that God will use her death, as a passage to a better life for her.  But in a way, we must be happy for her. At least her death has relieved her of all her pain of the last five years and especially her absolutely torturous suffering of the last two months.

Shanta had fought Cancer on almost three occasions earlier, since it was diagnosed on 4th January, 1998 - in Dar Es Salaam, Tanzania.  Her courage to fight the disease was an amazingly inspiring spectacle over the years.  But despite her determination and despite the best medical care, the Cancer had started spreading.  Since February, 2003, Shanta's condition had begun detiorating.  Hinduja Hospital, Mumbai - where she was being treated all these years, declared her case to be terminal and we had to bring her back home.  Gradually and very slowly, she had begun to lose physical functions like the ability to recognize people, eat, talk, respond, express herself, mobility etc.

She was obviously in traumatic pain - but, beyond a certain stage we could not even know whether she was feeling the pain, due to her inability to express herself either thru' words, or thru' actions.  Several times, we had to call our family doctor home, to try to attend to quite a few symptoms that she had developed and admit her to a hospital near our house ( Lok Hospital ) – as her main hospital  ( Hinduja Hospital ) had stopped all curative treatments almost three months ago – due to the advanced stage of the disease. Around a few days before Diwali ( A very important Indian festival ) itself, she had virtually stopped recognizing people.  Her last faint recognition of happenings around her, was on 23.10.03, the day of Diwali in the year 2003.

On Monday, the 27th October, 2003 she started gasping and developed further complications. We rushed her to Lok Hospital at Thane - which was near our residence.  Tests revealed that the Cancer had virtually galloped within a week and spread through her windpipe, throat, abdomen and kidneys - apart from the original cancer effects on the brain, lungs and liver.  In the hospital, she was awake - but blanked out.  However, it appeared that she was trying to see us, as her eyes seemed to be following everyone who entered the ICU.  But, on the 31st her eyes were closed and her pressure was dropping.  We had requested the doctors in the ICU, to inform us when she was nearing the end, so that Vinu and Sai could be beside her.  We were waiting along with our personal close friends down in the hospital grounds during the entire night of 31st.

By 4.30 a.m. Vinu and Sai went up and sat outside the ICU.  By 5.45 a.m. on the 1st November, as requested by them, the doctors called them in.  Vinu and Sai went in and stood beside her. Her blood pressure had fallen to almost 59 / 38 and she was sinking rapidly. Vinu touched her on the forehead and kept calling out to her and Sai was muttering a prayer in his mind - holding Vinu. Finally at around 6.04 a.m. - she stopped breathing.  But the monitors showed life.  Then with a faint small gasp at around 6.05 a.m. on Saturday, 1st November, 2003, she breathed her last and the monitors went blank.  After all confirmatory tests, the doctors pronounced her dead.

We brought the body home at around 8.00 a.m. and informed all close friends. Most of our close friends came.  She was bedecked in a red saree at home. Sai's close friends and Sashi made arrangements for the legal issues on the cremation.  Other close friends helped out with all the religious plans and formalities.  As per advise by the priest, we took Shanta out of the house for cremation at around 1.30 p.m. in the afternoon.  After performing all pujas at the crematorium, in the absence of our elder son Puneet,  Vinu lit her funeral pyre. Later early morning on the 2nd,  Vinu, Sai, Sashi, Madhu, Raja & Vijay,  returned back to the crematorium at 5.30 a.m. along with the Priest.  Vinu once again performed all prayers with the Priest and collected her ashes  ( Asthi ).  We then drove to the Ghodbunder creek and Vinu immersed her ashes in the reasonably clean water flowing out into the sea, from there.

In November, 2003 - On Monday - the 10th, Tuesday - the 11th and Wednesday - the 12th November, 2003 from 8.30 a.m. upto 11.00 a.m;  rituals and prayers were performed by a team of four brahmins at Siva Saayujyam Hall,  Near Circle,  Khopar-Khairane,  New Bombay.  Some of the rituals were -  Pindhams, Prabhudaballi, Shanti-Homam, Angraha Homam, Punyaha-Vachanam, Anjaneya Homam, Jasam, Yaman-Homam, Shavandi Brahmana Dhanams etc.  On Thursday - the 13th November, 2003 final rituals and prayers were performed by a team of six brahmins at our residence at Thane to perform The Navagraha Shanti Homam and Punyathithi.  All close friends of our family attended the above prayers and honored the memory of Shanta, by staying on for lunch.  Later all flowers and ritualistic materials related to the above were once again immersed at Ghodbunder Creek by Vineet.

Our family is greatly indebted to all our friends, who have given courage and morally supported Shanta, during her last days - Especially, Mr. & Mrs. Rao,  Mr. & Mrs. Shetty,  Mr. & Mrs. Mallik,  Mr. & Mrs. Padmanabahan,  Mrs. Babita Manjeshwar,  Mr. Chandrashekar Jangam,  Mr. & Mrs. Seshadri,  Mrs. Menon,  Dr. Sachin Almel,  Dr. Stephen Alfred  &  Drs. - Mr. & Mrs. Parikh.  To all of them, we say - Thank you so much  !  We, the family members of Shanta, are ever indebted to all of them.

Death ends a life, not a relationship.  What she had done for herself may have passed away with her.  But what she has done for her children and for her family remains immortal  !  May God grant us the serenity to accept the things that we cannot change, the courage to change the things that we can and the wisdom to know the difference ............

Shanta's Regular Prayer During Her Last Days.

Om Asatoma, Sadgamaya -
Tamasoma, Jyotir Gamaya -
Myrityoma, Amritam Gamaya  !

- meaning -

From delusion, lead me to Truth -
From darkness, lead me to Light -
From death, lead me to eternal life  !